My name is Shen-Mai-Ji. My friends just call me MEI-MEI. I am a happy girl who is full of life.

After I graduated, I came to Beijing, began working and started a whole new life.


I find that a working life is not easy, and it is also lonely at times, especially when I am alone at night.

  It is a Tuesday morning when a new colleague start at my office. Her name is Fong-Raw-Yuen.

I find she is a good conversationalist, very lively. She never takes life too seriously, always looking on the positive side of situations.

  As strangers in Beijing, although we came from different cities, we become close due to the similar situation we are now in.

  After we have been close friends for a month, I realize Fong is always very nice to me, and I begin to really like having her as my best friend.

I want to tread her well as my friend unconditionally.


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 楼主| 冬之忆 2004-2-18 13:59 显示全部楼层
  At weekends we often ride bicycles around the alley ways of Beijing, climb Shi-ang Mountain or even visit the zoo to give the monkeys nick-names.

  we work hard in the office, helping each other like sisters,

  We soon left our accommodations provided by work, and rent a 2 bedroom flat in Huai-diam District.

  Fong’s room faces daylight but mine is always in shadow. However we both feel warmth from our friendship.

  We often write our thoughts down, watch TV or chat to others on the internet.

  Our happiest moment of the day would be after work when we go to the super market to buy things for tea.


  I know Fong would like to eat different food from me, so we often cook 3 or 4 dishes for dinner.

  My English is very basic, but she has passed level 6, so I could practice my English with her.

  Our neighbor’s door is always closed, with a pair of trainers outside. We hear the music from the room, which is sang by a famous pop star, the lyrics described a love story.

  I and Fong think that the song describes the emotions we both feel, but there is no reason for us to feel that way.

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 楼主| 冬之忆 2004-2-18 14:08 显示全部楼层
  We can not deny our mutual attraction any more, but we know nothing would come of it.

  The happiness is ours and it feel like the world belonged to us.

  Fong’s dream is to take the ‘Master course’, I persuade her to quit work and follow her dream.

  She stays at home each day studying and preparing food for when I get home from work.

  One day after work, Fong ask me to have dinner outside. After dinner she gives me a nice teddy bear and I realize it is my birthday today.

  Because I feel so secure in her presence, I hug her and cry. I feel the whole city belonged to me.

  Every night when I cuddle the teddy bear, I feel that I have found the place where I belong.

  Fong’s Mother come to visit us in Beijing, she bring some traditional food from their hometown. She reminds me of my Mum. I even begin to call her ‘Mum’.

  Her Mum tells me lots of interesting stories about when Fong was younger. She would play ‘house’ just like I used to.

  Fong is the only child in her family. Her Mum wants her to marry earlier, so she could be able to see her grandchildren. Been hearing this, we express each other with a smile, and just look at the floor.
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 楼主| 冬之忆 2004-2-18 14:15 显示全部楼层
  We do not know what our feeling for each other really is.

  After Fong’s Mum left, I suggest that we should split apart because I am not sure about our future.

  We stand either side of the door crying heavily.

  I take my belongings back to work on the following Monday, and plan to stay at the arranged accommodation, without telling Fong.

  The night finally comes, but I can not sleep. I am tossing and turning on the bed, thinking about Fong.

  I decide to call Fong, but receive a text message form her as I was dialing. It said that she miss me and ask me to come back to hers.

  I grab my clothes and things and run out the office. My colleagues try to stop me from going, but I ignore their confused expressions and leave.

  We know it won’t be accepted, but our feeling is too strong

  Fong say my English really improved because I am very clever. I laugh and playfully tap her.

  Looking at my journal, I read the past time shared between us, and write what I feel now, and ponder our future.
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 楼主| 冬之忆 2004-2-18 14:21 显示全部楼层
  The weather is getting colder as winter draws closer.

  Fong is from southern China, so I worry that the weather in Beijing will be too cold for her. I go to buy wool to knit her a jumper.

  Recently, I work at lot of OT, so I get home late, but I find Fong is studying and the food is ready. I fall touch by this.


  I finish the jumper for Fong. She is very happy and wears it in front of the mirror.

  At midnight one night I awake, and go into Fong’s room. She is sleeping like a baby; I kiss her forehead and realized how happy we are.

  At night there is a meteor shower. I stand at the top of the building to watch them, I hope the shooting stars could continue long enough for me to make a wish, but they never stop.

  Fong pick me up from work. I get under her umbrella ant put my arm around her. When I see people’s reactions to this, I put my arm back down.

  We find out that Fong have got on to the ‘master course’. I am very proud and happy for her. We go shopping together at the weekend to celebrate.

  The summer is come, and the cicada bug’s are singing loudly. The streets are filled with good looking boys and girls.

  Fong tell me funny stories about her friends in university, who she chat in the canteen with. Some of them have strong regional accents, even sometimes she can not understand them.
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 楼主| 冬之忆 2004-2-18 14:31 显示全部楼层
  One day, when I go into our apartment, I see a boy past me in the opposite direction carrying a basketball. I soon find that Fong is not in.

  Often lately, Fong has been coming home late. I have the television on while I tidy up.

  After a few days I realize Fong have mentioned a boy called Gu-ang several times.

  Gu-ang is in a different department of Fong in university, he is always nice to people. When Fong talk about him, she avoids eye contact with me.

  Even though I throw on the clothes, I still felt cold in my heart.

  This year’s apples do not taste as good. I look into the distance at the red leaves on Shi-ang mountain should not be that colour yet

  I visit Fong at her university and see her playing badminton with her friends. She is also whit a boy. I realize he must be Gu-ang.

  I and Fong go to KFC for dinner in the evening.

  We discuss the past and the future of us, she seems different from before, and this make me feel cold inside.

  I can not see Fong clearly, but her coldness towards me is easy to see

  I cook her favorite food. We ate without talking. Actually, I put too much salt in, but we still eat it all.

  The night is beautiful but sad. It is black, but my heart feels darker.

  My head aches. When I open my eyes and see a boy looking at me, holding a white towel. I can hear the love song faintly, which is the one I have heard from my neighbor’s room before.

  The boy helps me to get home, while Fong and Gu-ang are trying to contact me.

  The weather is sunny and the sky is very bole. It is still very warm.

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 楼主| 冬之忆 2004-2-18 14:33 显示全部楼层
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 楼主| 冬之忆 2004-2-18 14:39 显示全部楼层
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